Nice Guys (don't) Finish Last.

Boys, stop saying that. 
And I already know this article will make some people really annoyed with me.
Eh.  I'm over that.

I once was talking to a friend who was frustrated that the girl he liked was into a "bad" guy, and he was stuck in the friendzone.  I didn't tell him what I thought, because honestly, he wouldn't have liked it.

He finished his rant by uttering the phrase, "Nice guys finish last..."

I just, I just.... I have so many problems with that.
I'm about to get a little rambly.

Friendzoning is a real thing.  I won't deny that.  But if you are stuck in the friendzone, it's partially your fault!  When I say partially... I mean mostly.

If you are a boy reading this, let's call your paramour Honey.  Just to simplify.

Honey put you in the friendzone because you didn't do anything to tell her otherwise.  Yes, you are the good guy in her life.  You listen, you give advice, give the best hugs, and tell her how special she is.  Just to be clear, you basically do the same things her best girlfriends do.  And you will not get different considerations because you are a guy.  You can't wait for Honey to figure out she should fall into your arms.  She won't do that by herself.  She will keep dating douchebags until you do something that sets you apart from her other girlfriends.

Also, every girl goes through a douchebag phase.  We see that jerk and think we can tame him.  We think we can be the one to make him commit and come back down to earth.  And deep down, Honey knows it isn't possible.  She knows it is better to stay away.  But she wants to be a little crazy, and a little bad.  Bad boys see girls like Honey a mile away and enjoy reeling them in.  It's a sick game.  If you want to save you and Honey the heartache that roller coaster delivers... you have to step in reaaallly early on in the game.

I get it, you see the best in her.  She is a great girl.  Rejection is scary.  But I will tell you the same thing you tell her when that douche from before breaks her heart.

If she doesn't want you, you don't deserve her.

If you are the nice, sweet, down-to-earth, prince charming you profess to be (don't misinterpret my sarcasm, I really am sure you have the best intentions) then don't settle for a girl who is set on chasing the wrong men.

Don't wait for her to come around.

My rendition of the phrase is like this:
Nice guys underestimate themselves.

Before I met my husband, I dated my mix of jerks and nice guys.  The nice guys were great.  But they weren't the man I was looking for.  Not the guy I needed.

If she rejects you, accept she doesn't see you as her soul mate.  Don't waste time.  Stop falling for your best friend.  Focus on your own search.  Because there is a girl out there that will love everything you are.

Just, ok?

Keep being nice guys. 
You don't finish last.

It isn't a race!