I've been witness to a miracle.
And no, I don't mean that in an I've-seen-something-pretty-astounding-that-surprised-me way.
I mean, a 100% authentic, life-altering, makes you weep tears of joy miracle.
Let me paint you a picture.
(Please note, I promise not to exaggerate if you promise to read to the end, deal?)
It was August, 2014. My husband and I had been married for 2 and a half years.
First of all, our bodies were 100% done. I was working a job where Red Bull was my main source of fluid, and Josh (attempting to work through as much school per semester as our schedules would allow) was on the easy-to-grab diet. We had both gained weight that refused to leave. But more than the weight, we were so tired. When I say tired? I mean, utterly spent. Waking up was a chore, maintaining mental clarity was taxing, and exercise? We'd get discouraged too quickly to give it a try. Keeping up with my toddler was equivalent to running a marathon.
We're in our early 20's... we felt like 50.
Second, work left us unfulfilled. In fact, last August I was let go from a job that has assured me most emphatically, they would be keeping me long term. A job that told me on a weekly basis I was doing amazing. In fact, 2 days before they dismissed me, I chatted in my manager's office about my position with the company, and he had told me it was concrete. My dear husband was racing to finish school, for a job he had told me, more than once, he was not close to passionate about. He knew it was a means to an end: supporting a family. He felt noble in that. He felt like it was enough. That broke my heart. I wanted more for him. So much more! Our schedules were so busy, we saw each other maybe 1 or 2 days a week, if we were lucky.
We were knowingly accepting a life of mediocrity.
Third, we no longer felt like ourselves. We were not happy. Things that used to consume me, like my writing, music, being outdoors, dancing... meant little. The love of my life hardly played basketball, hadn't done a drawing in months, and seemed mildly supportive at his highest of high. We would wonder to each other "what happened?" Was this simply a slump that all married couples go through? When does it end? On paper we are doing what we are supposed to... but why do I feel so DANG EMPTY?!
One day, enough was enough. If we had to break the norm to do it, dang it, we would.
So we changed a few things.
And we started being reeeeal honest with each other, and ourselves about what we really wanted.
He said, I want to be home with you all the time.
I said, I want that too.
I said, I want to have a body that feels like it should.
He said, I want us to feel young.
I said, I want to travel.
He said, I don't want to work behind a desk my whole life.
I said, I want to help people.
He said, I want to build a financial legacy for our children.
I said, I need to finish my book.
He said, you need to finish your book.
I said, I want another baby.
He said, I'll help!
We said, no more mediocre. No more typical. No more monotony.
We said, what if?...
And we said, the only thing standing in our way, is US.
Here is a new picture.
It is February, 2015. My husband and I have been married for 3 years and 2 months.
First of all, we are at our healthiest since we've been married. It gets better every day. We exercise (which is pretty impressive for me, because I am now pregnant with our second child), and enjoy it! I can think clearly, and all the fog is GONE. Josh has lost so much weight, we are needing to reconstruct his wardrobe! We have the energy two adults in their early 20's SHOULD have. We enjoy eating healthy, and have incorporated a nutritional cleansing system that is out of this WORLD. In fact, as I type this, my husband is breaking in another pair of new workout shoes at the gym. Oh, and he plays basketball every week. The boys he plays with have started calling him THE HOSCH. Yeah, like THE HULK.
Second, we have found it. Our dream job. We now help people gain ownership of their lives, physically and financially, and enjoy telling the status quo to SHOVE IT. We work for ourselves, so no chance of losing this job! Ever. It has ignited such a passion in us, we can't imagine doing anything else. It is bringing us closer and closer to ending those "day jobs" forever, and working from home as a team every day! Yeah, we're not mad about it. ;D
And third. We have long talks about where we are at. As humans, individuals, a couple, parents, etc. And we are in agreement, we are the happiest selves we've been in years. Complete, whole, fulfilled, assured.
And guys, I weep those tears of joy at least every other day. Maybe this doesn't seem like a miracle to you, but my life has taken a turn in the opposite direction. And it is amazing over here.
You know what's funny, too? All those years spent going by the textbook were supposed to offer so much structure, assurance, stability, and happiness. And we never felt that way for a minute. Fear, though. A lot of that.
And now? People have called us crazy, that our choices are unstable, and will fail us in the end. We've been told that we should be realistic.
I don't know guys, what I'm feeling is pretty real.
I'm not afraid anymore.
I have such an overwhelming sense of peace.
I am telling you.
Miracle.
